When it comes to parents, there a number of things over the years that you don’t really convey the way you want to. I don’t know if it is because I am afraid to tell them, or nervous, or because I think they won’t understand, or maybe it is possibly my unconscious fears of the unknown. Here are 5 things that I do not tell my parents enough, or things that I just don’t tell them. A LOT of these things go along with my post College Is.. (Enter Word Here).
1) HOW MUCH I LOVE THEM –It is not that my parents do not know that I love them, it is the fact that I do not take enough opportunities to tell them so. One of my greatest fears that causes many of my nightmares is that my parents die. I honestly do not know what I would do without either of them and it scares me to death to think about them dying. You would think that this kind of fear would make me tell them I love them more, but for some reason it doesn’t. So take the opportunity to text or call your parents right now and tell them how much you love them. My parents are so incredibly amazing and I am blessed to be their daughter. I need to be sure to tell them that more often.
2) THAT I AM HOMESICK – Being away from your parents seems like no big deal when you are headed to college. You have this false idea of how busy and crazy your life will be and that you won’t even glance back to your old life. My first semester of freshman year I probably went home at least every other weekend. It really doesn’t hit you how much you’re going to miss your family until about one week into your college experience. It really makes you appreciate all your parents did for you (laundry, meals, ect). I feel like the reason I and many others try not to let off that they are homesick is because they want to feel like a grown up and want their parents to think so also. What I have come to grips with is that being homesick doesn’t mean that you are not grown up, it means that you love your family. Even with that understanding, I still don’t give out any hints that I am homesick when I talk to my parents on the phone. Even if I cry after hanging up with them, I for some reason can stay strong during the actual conversation. Moral of the story, if you don’t want to let your parents know how homesick you are, then just go home for the weekend.
3) THAT I AM NOT DOING GREAT IN SCHOOL –I feel that when parents come to visit you at school or if you go home there is always the same question brought up, “How are your classes going?”. This question can be the most dreaded moment of your life depending on your current set of grades. When I get asked this question I respond with a casual “they are going good”, and then try to flip the conversation to something else. Luckily for me, I have been able to pull out great grades by the end of the semester, even if I wasn’t doing so hot in the middle. Maybe it would be easier to tell my parents the truth if I wouldn’t get a response like this, “Well you better stop watching
all that Netflix and stop blogging so much so you can study more. We better see those grades up by the end of the semester”. The problem with not doing this from a parents point of view is that they do not want to encourage bad grades so something must be said to “push” your motivation button a little harder. The other problem with lying to your parents about your grades is that you get to the end of the semester and have a C in the class and your parents say, ” You got a C in Biology? I thought you were doing great in that class and loved it?”. This is where it can get you into trouble.
4) THAT I HAVE A NEGATIVE BODY IMAGE SOMETIMES –My parents raised me to not be judgmental and be proud of who I am . They also encouraged a happy lifestyle full of personality and expression. That is why I feel they would be surprised that I have a negative body image sometimes. I would assume that almost every woman and most men experience this at some point in their life. For me that time is right now. Do not get me wrong, I really do love myself. The reason I have this negativity sometimes is because of the standards that some people uphold. I have always been a people pleaser. So much in fact that I get my boyfriend to send back my food if it is wrong because I don’t want to anger or upset the waiter. Sometimes I don’t even bother sending it back because it is so much of a hassle. I know that is a little extreme, but it is something I just hate doing. When I say I need to please people, I get funky ideas in my head that I do not fit into the cliche body type. I have never been a girl who wore bikinis, even if I wanted to. I have never wanted to wear tight clothing because I was worried of how I looked. I have also had bad acne before and continue to worry about it everyday. I am not perfect and I have accepted that nobody is perfect. That doesn’t mean that a few times I haven’t wished I was more “perfect”. I am comfortable in my own skin. There are just some sparse moments where I do get a little down in the dumps. These are the moments when I remind myself that God made me the way I am and that he loves me no matter what I look like. I wouldn’t trade to be anyone else on earth but me. That is how I want to live my life. I want to keep this from my parents so that they don’t worry about me. I want them to be proud that I am strong and confident without those judgmental thoughts.
5) THAT I HATE WHEN THEY FIGHT –Everybody in the world has been in an argument, disagreement, or fight before. Although I may fight with them , it kills me to see my parents argue. I have had so many friends go off the deep end because of their parents getting a divorce. I have seen it ruin their lives and I have seen how miserable they are by it. I believe in my parents love and even if they have told me they would never get divorced, it still doesn’t stop me from thinking about it. Because I am older, I can recognize a bad fight when I see one. It hurts me to see them when they are angry at each other or even ignoring each other. I try to avoid it and stay strong when this happens. I love my family so much that it would kill me if a divorce ever did happen. Luckily I was blessed with parents who do not give up on their marriage even when it gets tough. I just wish that they knew how much it upsets me when I see them fight. I do not let them know this because I do not want them to know that I get upset over something they do. I know that they would feel bad for causing me so much stress over something that I can not control.
Do you keep anything from your parents? Share by commenting!